Having a discussion about the difference between being unaware and denial. There is a difference. When a person is unaware of an issue that's brought up, the response often is, "Gosh, do I do that? Man, can you help me deal with this, do you have any ideas?"
Denial is different. When one is in it, he becomes strongly defensive, perhaps agitated, possibly argumentative---justifying his perspective or behavior. Such responses indicate that the demon of denial has appeared.
When relating with others, and this monster lurks, frustrating myself has no appeal. There's no point in arguing with a person when they are drunk. When we're in denial we are emotionally intoxicated, beyond reasoning, we're no different than a person that has had one too many swigs at a bottle.
Besides, when there's a difference of opinion, I don't care to argue; I share my position and leave it at that. It's not my role to convince others. Other than when confronting another person who is denial, they may be right. I find heated discussions unproductive; they're only good for escalating tension and create ill-will. Who delights in that?
It was interesting noting this man's overt denial as we spoke about this very subject. It's not my job nor desire to change anyone. There is only one God and I'm not Him.
I did warn him I will not avoid reminding him of this demon of denial that lives in the living room of his heart.
1. I'm thankful for sanity I enjoy by not pursuing fruitless discussions. I have better ways of investing my time that offer a better return.
This same person wanted to analyze his actions as we inventoried areas needing growth. I stopped that. We need a different consciousness than the one that created them. Analysis doesn't change anything. Action does. Taking steps, albeit tiny ones, leads to substantial growth. Flowers, oak trees, human physical growth are all incremental; but they provide big results over time.
2. I'm grateful for the progress that occurs when we stay in the solution, looking at healthy alternatives to the problems that confront us.
Denial is different. When one is in it, he becomes strongly defensive, perhaps agitated, possibly argumentative---justifying his perspective or behavior. Such responses indicate that the demon of denial has appeared.
When relating with others, and this monster lurks, frustrating myself has no appeal. There's no point in arguing with a person when they are drunk. When we're in denial we are emotionally intoxicated, beyond reasoning, we're no different than a person that has had one too many swigs at a bottle.
Besides, when there's a difference of opinion, I don't care to argue; I share my position and leave it at that. It's not my role to convince others. Other than when confronting another person who is denial, they may be right. I find heated discussions unproductive; they're only good for escalating tension and create ill-will. Who delights in that?
It was interesting noting this man's overt denial as we spoke about this very subject. It's not my job nor desire to change anyone. There is only one God and I'm not Him.
I did warn him I will not avoid reminding him of this demon of denial that lives in the living room of his heart.
This person's reaction allowed me to know I have better uses of my time than pursuing the subject of denial regarding his relationship with a predatory woman.Faithful are the wounds of a friend but the kisses of the enemy are deceitful. The full soul loathes the honeycomb, but to the hungry soul [the one that doesn't have discernment or recovery] every bitter thing is sweet. Proverbs 27:6-7
1. I'm thankful for sanity I enjoy by not pursuing fruitless discussions. I have better ways of investing my time that offer a better return.
This same person wanted to analyze his actions as we inventoried areas needing growth. I stopped that. We need a different consciousness than the one that created them. Analysis doesn't change anything. Action does. Taking steps, albeit tiny ones, leads to substantial growth. Flowers, oak trees, human physical growth are all incremental; but they provide big results over time.
2. I'm grateful for the progress that occurs when we stay in the solution, looking at healthy alternatives to the problems that confront us.
Post a Comment
Post a Comment