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Fraser Trevor Fraser Trevor Author
Title: More Tales from the Dark side of Narcissism:Sex for the narcissist is an instrument designed to increase the number of Sources of Narcissistic Supply.
Author: Fraser Trevor
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 If it happens to be the most efficient weapon in the narcissist's arsenal - he will make profligate use of it. In other words: if th...
Sigmund Freud, founder of psychoanalysis, smok...
 If it happens to be the most efficient weapon in the narcissist's arsenal - he will make profligate use of it. In other words: if the narcissist cannot obtain adoration, admiration, approval, applause, or any other kind of attention by other means (e.g., intellectually) - he resorts to sex. He then become a satyr (or a nymphomaniac): indiscriminately engages in sex with multiple partners. His sex partners are considered by him to be objects not of desire - but of Narcissistic Supply. It is through the processes of successful seduction and sexual conquest that the narcissist derives his badly needed narcissistic "fix". The narcissist is likely to perfect his techniques of courting and regard his sexual exploits as a form of art. He is very likely to expose this side of him - in great detail - to others, to an audience, expecting to win their approval and admiration. Because the Narcissistic Supply in his case resides in the act of conquest and (what he perceives to be) subordination - the narcissist is forced to move on and to switch and bewitch partners very often. The first sexual encounter with a partner always includes these elements - not so the second or third encounters.

Some narcissists prefer "complicated" situations. If men - they prefer virgins, married women, avowed maidens, etc. The More "difficult" the target - the more rewarding the narcissistic outcome. Such a narcissist may be married, but he does not regard his extra-marital affairs as either immoral or a breach of any explicit or implicit contract between him and his spouse. He keeps explaining to anyone who cares to listen that his other sexual partners are nothing to him, meaningless, that he is merely taking advantage of them and that they do not constitute a threat and should not be taken seriously by his spouse. In his mind a clear separation exists between the honest "woman of his life" (really, a saint) and the whores that he is having sex with. He tends to cast the whole feminine sub-species in a bad light (with the exception of the meaningful women in his life). His behaviour will, thus, have achieved a dual purpose: the securing of Narcissistic Supply, on the one hand - and bringing about a replay of old, unresolved conflicts and traumas (abandonment and the Oedipal conflict, to mention but two). When inevitably abandoned by his spouse - the narcissist is veritably shocked and hurt.

This is the sort of crisis, which might drive him to psychotherapy. Still, deep inside, he feels compelled to continue to pursue precisely the same path. His abandonment is cathartic, purifying. Following a period of deep depression and suicidal ideation - the narcissist is likely to feel cleansed, invigorated, unshackled, ready for the next round of hunting.
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