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English: Facial emotions. (Photo credit: Wikipedia) |
Emotional sobriety is tied up in our ability to self regulate on both a mind and body level, to bring ourselves into balance when we fall out of it. Issues with excessive self medication say with food, alcohol or drugs or compulsive approaches to activities like sex, work or spending tend to reflect a lack of ability to comfortable self regulate. Emotional Sobriety is about finding and maintaining our emotional equilibrium, our feeling rheostat, the one that helps us to adjust the intensity of our emotional responses to life.Emotions impact our thinking more than our thinking impacts our emotions. When our emotions are out of control, in other words, so is our thinking. And when we can’t bring our feeling and thinking into some sort of balance, our life and our relationships show it.
In order to maintain our emotional equilibrium, we need to be able to use our thinking mind to decode and understand our feeling mind. That is, we need to feel our feelings and then use our thinking to make sense and meaning out of them.
Balance is that place where our thinking, feeling and behavior are reasonably congruent; where we operate in a reasonably integrated flow. We are not “off the wall” and at those moments when we do fly off the wall, as all of us do and probably need to now and then, we can find our way back homeagain. We can “right” ourselves .
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