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Fraser Trevor Fraser Trevor Author
Title: Enablers often become more and more frustrated and angry, because “helping” only seems to make their addicted loved one worse.
Author: Fraser Trevor
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Do any of these examples sound familiar?  Each of these is a common action of an “enabler”. Paying their bills Cleaning up vomit or oth...

Do any of these examples sound familiar?  Each of these is a common action of an “enabler”.
  • Paying their bills
  • Cleaning up vomit or other messes made while they were drinking or using drugs
  • Calling in sick for the addict or alcoholic, making excuses for why they can’t go to work
  • Bailing them out of jail or getting legal help for them
  • Believing their lies…over and over
  • Accepting the addict or alcoholic family member’s excuses
  • Avoiding discussions of their substance abuse, afraid that it will “make things worse”
  • Calling a teenager’s drug abuse “a phase” or “well, I did it when I was young, and I’m fine now”
  • Allowing yourself to be physically and mentally abused by the addict
  • Making addictive behavior seem “normal” to your children, or expecting them to act as if nothing is wrong in the family
  • Letting your addicted friend or loved one change the subject when you bring up their substance abuse problem
Dysfunctional family relationships tend to act in ways that prevent the healthy physical and emotional growth of each member. Enabling behavior is an excellent example of dysfunctional behavior in a family with addiction.  By enabling, you help the addict or alcoholic avoid taking the hard steps towards recovery, and can promote the increasing severity of their addiction.
Enablers often become more and more frustrated and angry, because “helping” only seems to make their addicted loved one worse.
If you recognize yourself, or your parent or child, in any of the above examples, get help.  You may not be able to make your addicted loved one seek help, but you can refuse to support him in his addiction.

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